Hamburg

We started off with breakfast at Alex on the south edge of the Alter. As a buffet breakfast, it means the girls will definitely find something they will eat. This plan worked – G ate a mammoth portion of pancakes with fruit and a croissant. No apple juice though, only orange. A lovely view for breakfast, as we reflected maybe we should have brought an extra layer out with us – it wasn’t exactly cold, but was spotting with rain…

We bravely soldiered on to Planten un Blomen – quite possibly the best thing in Hamburg. A series of connected parks covering a huge area North-South on the West side of central Hamburg. Our goal was the Bullerberg playground which the kids deserved given their patience and being cooped up the day before. We heard the playground before we saw it, and indeed it was pretty busy – not overly so, but active. This was in contrast to the generally quiet streets we’d seen so far – I guess it was a Tuesday mid-morning! We found out later that schools were still operating so presumably these were organised visits. We were surprised to see many kids in swimsuits and a little water play area – we hadn’t brought such kit with us, but hatched a plan to possibly return equipped in the afternoon. After we’d played a bit, we made our way down through the gardens enjoying the flowers, tranquility and the occasional statue. There was another playground with rope climbing frame (our girls love those) and a setup for smaller kids where water could be dispensed from pipes and pumps, and routed and blocked with a series of wooden dams with sluice gates. Such a great plaything and so instructive about engineering, logic, teamwork. I couldn’t work out how the water came out – I assume some kind of timer.

It was getting to lunchtime and Google Maps showed a place called Haus5 not far away. This was a popular place, but we managed to get an outdoor table. Evidently, Haus5 has a social inclusion mission, which we hadn’t realised. The service and food was great, the only snag being we really did have to rely on my German… which did the job, just about. https://www.haus5.info/das-unternehmen/

Refuelled, we decided we still had some walk left in us and I suggested the Elbtunnel, which is just a tunnel under the river for pedestrians and cyclists, but is nice, cool and on the other side there is a viewpoint from which to look at the city, and an ice cream van to sustain you while you do so.

Back to the other side and we took the U bahn from Lamdsbrucke back to Rathaus to save our legs. We had a breather back at the hotel then set off again back to the playground, but a different way through the chi-chi shopping streets. This time we turned up, and while it was much warmer and sunnier than in the morning, there was no water play happening! Never mind, the girls were happy to have another half an hour or so on the big slides and climbing things. I’d seen something else in this wonderful park – a fountain display, supposedly there should be one on the hour, so we headed to the See pavilion, a little drinks kiosk with some seats by the water. There was live music…but that came from a little open air amphitheatre where a Police Brass Brand Orchestra was playing. We bought some drinks and I asked when the next “show” was…6pm, not 5pm. Still, it was all very pleasant and so we savoured our drinks while the girls made friends and entertained a 2 year old, so no-one was bored. Then, sure enough, the fountains sparked up at 1800 precisely! We watched a few moments, took a few videos but then hotfooted it down via the metro to the Miniatur Wunderland.

The Miniatur Wunderland is one of the big tourist attractions in Hamburg and is on a strip of the Speicherstadt dockyard alongside the Hamburg Dungeon etc. So Touristastical. We’d booked a “no queue” 1830 ticket…but there was no queue anyway. I was starting to feel a bit conned – I’d expected an outdoor layout of the world in miniature, instead we were very much indoors going up several flights of stairs into something like a senior school art department. And then you get into the display rooms, and it’s all dark! Flipping heck, this is going to be rubbish…and it was busy with people too. I hadn’t realised that it was only dark because we’d arrived in Wunderland nighttime, which lasts maybe 5 minutes before daytime recommences…and I also hadn’t appreciated the SCALE of the place – you see the first room, densely packed with vistas of Hamburg, and think, ok, bit interesting, then you realise there’s another room with more Germany and USA, including the Grand Canyon…then it continues, with huge micro layouts of the Nordic countries, Switzerland and Austria – they clearly know who their customers are! I didn’t see a display for France or UK! 🤣

The scale and complexity is staggering – hundreds of tiny little scenes, often with movement you can trigger with a button, always with trains or other vehicles providing background action. A police shoot-out (in USA, natürlich), an ice fisher with a polar bear, a dance party at the Blue Oyster…and dozens more. To be honest, it was a bit overwhelming! Like being in a vast Where’s Wally cartoon where you’re not even looking for a specific thing, so you’re meant to look at EVERYTHING.

Two observations though – one, there were plenty of groups of grown-ups, many of whom gave every impression of having been there some time, and that it was by no means their first ever visit. There even seemed to be plane spotters at the miniature airport…I don’t really know what to make of this…just…odd.

Also, I don’t know what the cause and effect is, but the sophistication and engineering marvel of the Wunderland, and the technological wonders it showcases (the functional airport, a mine, all the trains) indicate a deep passion for how to do stuff – the same is true of the water dams thing earlier. Having kids inspired by this stuff can only be A Good Thing.

As we walked back to the guesthouse, we more or less fell into Bella Italia, a nice (and busy!l little Italian where we had a quick couple of pizzas before crashing out. We’d walked about 13km (on top of my 10k run), phew!